Monday, March 19, 2012

Faux Table Lamp

Two weeks ago, when our small vacuum cleaner died, Mama Wordbones asked if I was planning a trip to the dump anytime soon. I reminded her that we now have curbside bulk pick up in HoCo so a trip out to Alpha Ridge wouldn’t be necessary.

“Okay, you’re in charge of figuring that out then,” she suggested.

No problem.

I went online to HoCo Bureau of Environmental Services site and found out that all I needed to do was to schedule a pick up date which I could do right there on the site.

Piece of cake, or so I thought.

The first thing I was asked was whether or not I had a “Howard County Government Online Quick Pass.”

I didn’t. It sounded like something I might need again some time so I went ahead and signed up.

The next hurdle proved problematic. I was told to select my item from a list of bulk items. My choices were armoires, book shelf, box spring, chair, coffee table, couch, desk, dresser, end table, fiberglass laundry tub, love seat, mattress, ottoman, sofa (non-sleep style), table lamp, wood chair, wood entertainment center, wood headboard, and wood table.”

Vacuum cleaner wasn’t a choice. Neither was “other.”

It wouldn’t allow me to type in vacuum cleaner or leave the space blank. I had to pick from their list.

I went in the garage to take another look at our newly decommissioned vacuum cleaner. Mama Wordbones had already removed a couple of the larger plastic pieces and put them in the recycle bin. It no longer looked like a vacuum.

I decided it was now a table lamp.

Tomorrow is my scheduled pick up day and I don’t know if my ersatz table lamp will survive the scrutiny of the Bureau.

I have a back up plan. If it doesn’t get picked up tomorrow I’ll just drive over to the dump on Saturday morning.
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